Adam Lanza’s forum posts

These quotes were buried at the bottom of a previous post, and with the traffic on this blog increasing drastically, many are probably looking for these forum posts by the Sandy Hook shooter, which were previously unknown. So, I’m re-posting them here.

The below quotes are from (mostly) cached forum threads from the site, a now-defunct forum dedicated to the Columbine killers, and mass shootings in general. Lanza posted under the username “Smiggles”, up until sometime in early 2012.

For evidence that these contributions were in fact written by Adam Lanza, see this post. I’ve added notes after some of the quotations. The links will lead to the original threads, usually in cached form.

I’m still waiting for a mass shooter who eschews 9mm pistols and instead buys an AK-47 pistol, 30 30-round magazines, and 1000 hollow points….” (while Lanza did not use an AK-47, he did bring copious 30-round magazines with him to Sandy Hook, and this is generally consistent with with his fixation on firepower)

How about how Mad_Bomber has been here for three years and he still hasn’t gone on a rampage? I thought he would’ve been on my catalog of mass murderers by now. 😦 ” (the “catalog of mass murders” is a spreadsheet on Lanza’s hard drive, noted in the full official report on Sandy Hook and frequently cited in news stories)

I don’t have any clue what transhumanists are thinking. My wet dream is living in the wild with apes, and theirs is living in a computer with AI.” (consistent with official report re: chimp society, and “Greg’s” radio appearance.)

“Gay marriage is legal in my state.” (Same-sex marriage was legalized in Connecticut in 2008)

I don’t like holidays, but I would say Halloween. It marks the beginning of my favorite time of the year, November-December, when the sunlight always seems to be its dimmest. Because of the snow, January and February always seem to be intolerably bright. I hate the sun so much. In any event, it’s neat that Halloween is the only widely-observed holiday which sort of has the potential to be tied to despair.” (according to the official report, Lanza hated holiday, was sensitive to light, and all of the windows in his room were completely blacked out, as show in crime scene photos:


(from the thread entitled “Moments that restore your faith in humanity, and in reference to another poster who had cited Anders Breivik, the Norway mass killer) “In a “My political ideology finally gets some attention” sense, a “Someone finally outdid Woo Bum-kon” sense, a “He looks so cute in those compression jammies” sense, or what?” (Woo Bum-kon is another mass-killer, and Breivik “outdid” him by killing more people, consistent with Lanza’s “high score” spreadsheet)

I used to think that I was asexual, but the primary reason why I thought that was because my BMI was 14.” (see: any photo or description of Lanza)

“I hate how life-apologists say (or rather, the very few of them who do anything other than mock you), “Life isn’t all suffering. What about the simple pleasures, like eating ice cream?They always use that example. Even if I didn’t recognize the flaws in their assertion, when I think of ice cream, I can only see a repugnant lump of pus crushed out of cows’ bloody nipples, who spend their entire lives confined in filth, where they’re periodically raped so that they’re incessantly pregnant, after which their calves are seized from them, destined to live the life of veal, with their only relief being an early death. From there, I always ride the pessimism train down different tracks until it inevitably leads me to contemplating over 500 million years of animals cannibalizing each other. Excuse me for not being thrilled by the extra jimmies on my ice cream cone.” (Lanza was a very strict vegan, and his disgust at the textures of animal-based foods is noted in the official report)

I looked up a bunch of Hoarders episodes earlier this month. As a compulsive organizer, I like to imagine how much pleasure I would get from throwing out everything in those places. My favorite hoarder was Andy.” (Lanza was obsessively, compulsively cleanly)

And, finally, some random insights into the shooter’s warped psyche:

Dead people in general receive more respect and blind compassion than they ever would have had while alive. I don’t understand it.

Literature is simply another coping mechanism for children who’ve been mindfucked by culturapists. They’re carried to other worlds in the stream of semen.

I castrated myself when I was 15 to rebel against society.

American mass murders were less prevalent before Richard Speck precipitated their rise in 1966. My best estimate for the -absolute- minimum amount of mass murders in the US since 1966 is 960. I would be surprised if there weren’t a minimum of somewhere around 1500 in reality, but we’ll just vaguely say that there have been over 1000. If you were trying to measure alienation in a society, what could be a more blatant indication? And it’s glib to dismiss them as not being indicative of anything just because there have been over a thousand of them instead of over a hundred thousand, or however many you think are necessary, because mass murdering is so ridiculously over-the-top of a response that very few people are prone to do it under any circumstances. But just look at how many fans you can find for all different types of mass murderers ”not just the [Columbine killers]”, and beyond these fans are countless more people who can sympathize with them; and beyond these are millions more who never think of relating the circumstances of their lives to anyone else but instead just go through the motions of life incessantly dissatisfied with their environment. Thinking of this society as the default state of existence is the reason why you think that humans would be “not well” for “no reason whatsoever”. Civilization has not been present for 99% of the existence of hominids, and the only way that it’s ever sustained is by indoctrinating each new child for years on end. The “wellness” that you speak of is solely defined by a child’s submission to this process and their subsequent capacity to propagate civilization themselves. When civilization exists in a form where all forms of alienation (among many other things) are rampant, as can be seen in the most recent incarnation within the last fifty years which AS55 talked about, new children will end up “not well” in all sorts of ways. You don’t even have to touch a topic as cryptic as mass murder to see an indication of this: you can look at a single symptom as egregious as the proliferation of antidepressants. And look in your own life. You’ve said that you’re afflicted by unrelenting anxiety and that you’re afraid to leave your house. Do you really think that the way you feel is not symptomatic of anything other than your own inexplicable defectiveness?

I can’t stop thinking about how much this [Pumped Up Kicks song] annoys me. Even if it wasn’t so lame, it would still bother me that they used the name “Robert”. Now one of my favorite mass shooters has been turned into a trendy stereotypical poster child of school shootings just because of his age, despite having nothing to do with the school shooter archetype. They could have used Michael, or Evan, or Barry, which would literally fit in with the whole “cowboy kid” thing.

“Self” is a delusion and life cannot be anything other than suffering.


About Reed Coleman

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43 Responses to Adam Lanza’s forum posts

  1. Zephyr says:

    Really incredible research you have done here. Still processing it. Question: How do we know that, with this prominent an online persona, Adam/Smiggles et al wasn’t simply the inspiration for someone else’s act? Do you think, based on your research of this individual, that he would absolutely have acted alone, or do you think he may have employed an accomplice? I ask because the 911 call audio seems (imo) to reflect multiple weapons, and even instances of return fire. Granted, this could be police exchanging fire with a shooter or shooters. To continue the clumsy segway, there are clear shots at 9:46 and 9:47 a.m., 6-7 minutes after the lead investigator claims the final shot was fired. If in fact the shooter in Room 10 committed suicide at 9:40:03 (I don’t believe he did), that would mean there was another shooter. Would the person you know as Adam Lanza/Greg/Smiggles work with a partner, do you think? Thank you again for this thought-provoking post.

  2. Anon says:

    Can I ask how you got access to some of the posts? I was a member of SBB and still can log in, but I am not able to see a lot of the posts, you quote.
    I can visit some of the pages in cache, but only through a randomly search per Google and its not possible to skip to other pages, because the site denies access.

    • Reed Coleman says:

      Try searching Google for the URL of the page you want to see. Then check if theres a cached link. Doesn’t always work but often enough.
      Are you able to access the result of clicking on the “Smiggles” profile link? I am not a member so have no way of knowing if there’s any info there.

      • Cerny says:

        You can type “ (space) smiggles” on Google

        to search within the website, and find the cached pages where he posted or his name appears. This include some posts that he deleted, but were quoted
        or reposted by other forum members.

  3. Anon says:

    Yes, I can look at smiggles profile and wander through his posts, but only those from the sections, who are still visible (not from the miscellaneous-area for example).
    And a lot of his early posts are redacted, apparently done by himself.

  4. NO SECRETS says:

    Thanks for your in-depth research. It will no doubt be useful as a future reference.

  5. LPorter101 says:

    As a former member of SBB*, I would like to say unequivocally that if I had ever had the slightest inkling that this kid was making specific threats and/or plans, I would have contacted law enforcement immediately.

    I am not shocked to learn that Adam Lanza posted on the site, but I am sickened and saddened. I had no contact with him, but I cannot help but wish that I had been able to influence his life in a positive way.

    One of the questions I always ask about Columbine was, “When did Eric and Dylan pass the point of no return?” I want to believe that they were salvageable up until the moment they started shooting. I want to believe that even those with the darkest impulses can be redeemed. But we’ll never know.

    I used to wonder how I would react if I ever found out that one of our members had gone on to commit an actual crime. Now I know.

    I cannot bring myself to wish that Lanza is writhing in eternal torment. But if there is any more reprehensible act than murdering innocent children, I am not aware of it.

    God bless the victims and their families.

    *Shocked Beyond Belief began as the discussion forum for the Super Columbine Massacre RPG! site. The original owner transferred control of the site to another individual.

    • Reed Coleman says:

      I can imagine the feeling. I don’t think any sensible person would look at the Smiggles forum posts (the ones I’ve seen, at least) and, without knowing who it was beforehand, sense that any specific event was in the offing. Just a general impression that the guy was not well.

    • anon says:

      Is there any way to get in touch with admins from the site? I believe you are/were at least a moderator.

      • LPorter101 says:

        I was a moderator, but I didn’t have much authority. (The board was fairly anarchic, if you’ll recall.) I wasn’t allowed to ban anyone, or even to suspend troublemakers’ accounts. Toward the end I wasn’t even allowed to delete posts.

        I’ve had no contact with the admin since SBB was shut down. All of my contact with the site owner was through the board – I didn’t even have her e-mail address. In fact, I didn’t even know that the site was shutting down until one day I tried to log in and my password didn’t work.

        Based on what I’ve been told, it seems that the owner simply got tired of dealing with the drama. I can’t say I blame her.

  6. Anon says:

    Hey, me again.
    Yes it does list, when smiggles was logged in for the last time: Tue Feb 28, 2012 8:06 am
    I also can send you a screenshot, but I dont find your mail adress at this site.
    But since I have to leave mine in this answer (I hope you can access it?), you can contact me and I send it to you.

  7. Ron Aigner says:

    We are the families of the Columbine victims and were posting our information on SBB. Knowledge that we had obtained by way of our research and with the help of Attorney John Decamp provided the necessity to create . This website and our youtubes etc. have over 3 million views. We are sure that Adam knew that Eric Harris was a raped boy. google january incident. We learned that Adam was also a raped boy. Google I am Adam Lanza I will be famous. We believe that Adam who was obsessed by Columbine, followed in his hero Eric Harris’s footsteps by taking revenge for being raped to school as Harris did. A good solid link that connects Adam Lanza or smiggles to Walsh buttrape.txt the better. We actually learned of the Walsh buttrape file on the SBB website. MnM found it in his research. We worked in CRTF for years. Mark and Donna Taylor visited Mama 4 paws.
    We’re learning that the FBI and Secret Service are corrupt as hell if they can’t see the written motive, “wrath for the January Incident” and a file Walsh Buttrape.txt, a picture shooter Harris drew the night of the January Incident. WTF? Here is a link that has Attorney John Decamp saying that the shooters were being used as sex toys.
    Columbine victim Mark Taylor was abducted and drugged when he was exposing the pedophilia that provoked the shooters. (We have the depositions of the Harris’s)

  8. Dave Burnett says:

    Ron: The more I looked into Lanza’s computer files, the more it became apparent that he was indeed very interested in Columbine. He had downloaded the entire Columbine report, as well as videos and pictures of the killers. You have a point there. My original comment was made in ignorance.

    However, I am unaware of a “YouTube” by Adam. Source?

    Also, whether or not Adam posted that on 4chan is unprovable. In the report, it states that a screenshot (note: not an archive) of that thread was used a “proof” to get a warrant for a search for Nancy’s house. This is never followed up upon, however, and there is no conclusive evidence that Adam posted there nor that that thread ever actually existed.

    • Ron Aigner says:

      I was hoping you would see this. I saw it as he big takeaway from what they call the final report. The Columbine report grew to over 40,000 pages. plus the ElPaso County report. We recently got the “Decamp files” over 16000 pages which includes the depositions of the Harris parents. A Columbine father Steve Schweitzberger and I had to purchase the first 11,000 pages, had it scanned and posted it on a Boulder newspaper website for use on CRTF. Most of the questions you ask can be found on our website. Any of these pre-tragedy posts/youtubes have not been debunked. A statement was made by Connecticut cops that any false information would be investigated and prosecuted to the full extent of the law. If these were proven to be false, it surely has caused mental anguish to the families of Columbine. We feel horrible that the warning that we have been aggressively reporting has gone unheeded and now a raped boy has indeed followed in the footsteps of the Columbine shooters. If there hadn’t been a January Incident, There wouldn’t have been a Columbine tragedy and there wouldn’t have been an Adam Lanza (raped boy) obsessed by Columbine. Our question is:
      How many raped boys are out there preparing for a school shooting? Adam wasn’t the first. We know of others. When raped boys learn that nothing has ever been done about the Columbine pedophilia, they become hopeless that anything will be done about the situation they find themselves in. Victims of pedophilia also hero worship Ricky Rodriquez. Google Ricky Rodriquez.
      You wouldn’t think that they would be protecting a pedophile cop? They wouldn’t do that now would they?
      I watched the youtube while it was still up but couldn’t download it.
      Now we’re dealing with the Arapahoe High School Shooting. More Stonewalling like Columbine.

    • Ron Aigner says:

      I forgot To mention that we never received the Jeffco School report. We learned that this is unheard of. All School Administrations submit a report. We are wondering where the Sandy hook parents are in this? The Columbine families have been demanding answers ever since the Columbine tragedy. We ask, no answers. They just silence us, persecute us. Google Mark and Donna Taylor. I also have a long list of persecution that I have dealt with. I have been a victim of police brutality twice. I have been falsely arrested, property rights harassment, etc. Example: 8 cops arrest me in front of my employees and customers at my restaurant and take me away in chains for not showing up for a hearing that I wasn’t required to attend. On another occasion I was attacked by a cop on roids and was dogpiled, injuring my back. I was investigating the Platte Canyon tragedy. More on that later. I have certainly paid my dues for exposing pedophilia. Realize that when we report the rape of the Columbine shooters, there are zero tolerance laws that make it MANDATORY to investigate. No agendas super cede the protection of Children. This is a serious, serious flaw in thecorrupt system.
      Why don’t you report the rape of Adam Lanza? You have credible evidence that Adam was raped. DEMAND THAT THEY INVESTIGATE! Tape your conversation and post it here. Demand a legislative inquiry, demand a grand jury investigation. If the Sandy hook families refuse to demand answers, it will answer a lot of questions.
      . An E-mail is usually ignored. We have even sent certified mail which is ignored. Where is the NSA when our representatives can’t even hear us? These Government agents must not have children. If so, they must be willing to betray their own children in covering this up. This isn’t just about raped kids, it’s about dead kids.
      Mark Taylor simply went to school on April 20,1999 and got caught between raped boys and the men who raped them. 20 dead first graders later, they still haven’t done anything to stop it. They should have listened to Mark instead of drugging him.

  9. Ron Aigner says:

    Go Broncos!
    Omaha Omaha Omaha Omaha Omaha hurry hurry
    We met David Shurter when we went to Omaha to pick up the Decamp files. I sure wish that the Big Jocks would protect the little Jocks. This happened at a Middle School that was a feeder school to Arapahoe High School.
    We contacted the Littleton School Admin. and gave them the links to our website etc. Hickenloopr threatened Mark Taylor’s attorney when Gov. Hickenlooper’s office learned of a free Mark Taylor website that had the information informing them of the January Incident. It had the question to Hickenlooper, “Why do you allow this travesty of justice in incarceration of Columbine victim Mark Taylor”? I hope Hickenlooper is sick about the Arapahoe High School tragedy. We are now in contact with State Senator Ted Harvey. We are waiting for a reply.

    You can do what we have been doing. Report the rape of the shooters. Tell them that you have credible information. See for yourself where it gets you. You can add Mathew Murray.
    His computer was replete with downloads on Columbine; killers Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold; the Virginia Tech massacre and its shooter, Cho Seung-Hui; the Platte Canyon hostage situation; and Ricky Rodriguez.

  10. Ron Aigner says:

    Don’t think that Mark is a friend of Michael Moore. Mark’s mother Donna went to a book signing at the Tattered cover book store on her knees asking for help for her son. We provided our information to Michael Moore’s sister in a long conversation while MM was signing books. Several friends who accompanied Donna Taylor also discussed this with MM. What a blob of disgusting lies. Now you know why he wants our guns. He protects pedophiles! It makes you think that there could be some little boys in his past.

    • bryan says:

      Someone is a conspiracy theorist… Adam did not have a youtube channel as you say and he certainly was never raped. Sure you can provide proof from unreliable news media and other conspiracy nut cases but at the end of the day none of these people were close to adam or knew anything about his day to day goings on. To act like you do is pure folly.

      • Ron Aigner says:

        Why don’t you do something instead of accusing people of being a CT. I tire of this garbage. Here, research Lake County Sheriff Gary Borders. It looks like he comes with a background of liking the little children. You be in charge of exposing him and protecting the children. I sure appreciate the help. Let us know what you find out about him. You might look into the Polk County Sheriff . He pretends to be a pedophile hunter. Hah! Sounds like a good cover. The Columbine families contacted Grady Judd when this story came out. We told him about the January Incident. Google January Incident.

  11. Ron Aigner says:

    You will have to prove that Adam didn’t post the You tube. Do you have proof that Adam didn’t post this you tube? Remember that Connecticut State Police stated that they would prosecute any one who would post false info? Where is the prosecution. To act like you do is pure folly. What’s your opinion of the Columbine shooters being raped? Are you ready to engage us in that debate? Talk is cheap and you appear to be a troll if you don’t back up your info. Oh how about the 4 chan post? Are you ready to debate that too. You are so damn sure of what you state. Back it up or shut up.

  12. Ron Aigner says:

    Listen to School Safety expert Wolfgang Halbig talk about the Columbine shooters being raped and that Columbine victim Mark Taylor was abducted and drugged and he intends to set him free. Listen at 1hr 22 min.

  13. Sickos Not Wanted says:

    Wolfgang Halbig is a lunatic, and the fact that you claim him an expert tells me more about you, Ron, than any of the other crazy nonsense you’ve posted here. Why don’t you crawl back under whatever rock you slithered out from?

    • Ron Aigner says:

      More of your attacks on personality seems to prove you to be a shill. How much are you paid for this? What you may not know is when you attack me, you also attack many of the victims of Columbine and other well known researchers. You didn’t crqwl out from under a rock. You came directly from the depths of hell. Go back to where you came. Are you having fun yet? We are talking about dead children and you are playing games? You are sick and need help.

      • Sickos Not Wanted says:

        Ron, Ron, Ron — your dishonesty is unbecoming. Personally, I don’t know how you can look at yourself in the mirror when you’ve preyed on the vulnerable to advance your own lust to whip the vulnerable into a frenzy over your manufactured conspiracy theories. Shame on you. Seriously — seek mental health assistance, and I’m happy to provide you with appropriate referrals. Your posts here make perfectly clear why SHES survivors — and the loved ones of those who didn’t survive — want NOTHING to do with your insanity and despise you & your ilk. And, BTW, quit acting like you speak for Columbine survivors because YOU DON’T other than an unfortunate you’ve preyed upon. Disgusting.

  14. Adam Matsczac says:


    Can you confirm these posts (located in the link below) for me? I know some of them are real, but others, I’m not sure of their veracity…


  15. Nicole says:

    Let me just say, I used to post on the old RPG and there really was no control there. I started researching Columbine after I watched a random documentary on the two shooters, and I decided to start posting. I also wrote a long paper about school shooters for a research methods writing class at my college. I do remember Porter being a decent mod, but the other mods who came along were awful and their ways of managing the board were very Draconian. I got banned because I said it wasn’t fair to give a warning to someone who mentioned Tumblr. I was probably one of the most normal people who posted there, but that probably isn’t saying much. The board really was a mess.

    People fought all the time, caused drama and said really sick things. If you said something that someone didn’t like, they would never let it go. I was stalked all over for two years straight by these mentally unstable people who’s main job was to “kick me off the internet” when I did nothing wrong to them. When I told the two newer mods (who were complete witches) on the old SBB, they just continually blamed me for the drama. There was a group of females who were jealous that I did youtube makeup videos, and harassed me on there until I had to shut down my two accounts. People would steal my pics and post them on FB on fake role player accounts, post my personal address, post what college I went to, etc. My FB and other accounts are all private now, anyways. Plus, I never gave out personal information; they just wanted to stalk me just to stalk me. They’re all seriously creepy people. I personally don’t know much about Adam Lanza, and this came as a shock to me, too that he would post on the old RPG and shoot up his mother’s classroom. I don’t think the board should be blamed for his actions. Though I do think stricter rules should’ve applied. I think the board should’ve been private, to non-members until they signed up and then have some security code they need to follow or what not.

    Oh well, makes people think twice about joining any kind of message board because a few idiots don’t know how to behave because their own lives are so worthless and boring they have to ruin it for the few smart, intelligent people by trolling forums.

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  18. Wood says:

    I remember posting a few times on the SBB board back in late-2010 – 2011, with the goal of trying to distinguish between the motives of a depressive and a sadist.
    I made a few posts about depression, bullying and suicidality, and it was definitely at the time he was frequenting the board. I even had a chat with people who called themselves ‘would-be’ shooters and how their lives changed since those darker days. I remember even saying ”what made you want to do such a thing? Why? What made you change your mind?”.
    If he was struggling, I don’t understand why he never spoke up. Apparently he was suicidal, but he made no contribution whatsoever when depression, bullying and/or self help was the topic of discussion.

    Just goes to show there are some people that really are beyond help. His mother messed up big time by allowing firearms around the house.

    • Reed Coleman says:

      Thanks for sharing your experience on the SCMRPG board. I agree that he was beyond help, at least in that sense where he would ever have asked for it himself or fully consented. It seems like Adam could only bring himself to ask for help anonymously (on youtube) which suggests to me he would never have followed through even if someone was responsive to his cry for help. He wasn’t willing to face the level of his own defect, no matter what. Perhaps most disturbing of all, it appears Nancy was in *almost* as deep of denial – we can at least assume that she would have done something if she knew what the cost of her blind eye was going to be.

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